On the women's article, men hardly responded at all, but women jumped right in with justification why they do the mean things they do, and blaming the men for it. He became angry and you know what to me the rest of the day. I especially do not like this when he does this with people in our work, we work together, people who I want my reputation and how I am seen to be correct. But to me it was the fact that everyone else got to feel special on those holidays, and I was alone, and felt even more alone without a phone call, an email or a card. Help. I am a stay at home mom so he works. To me it was my job considering he provided for us and our child. Anyway, I too live with a man that once loved me. At the same time, my husband was saying something so he stopped me by repeating my name and ask me if he can talk now. You aren't asking for much and it isn't shallow Actually I bet you are a thoughtful person! I told her I wish she would spend more time with us, but it started a fight about her working so hard for us. That hurts even more since I am not a happy loner. She hears and feels deeper than you do. Sad but true im sorry to my wife i fill like such an asshole now thanks . Sorry yours is that way but I know countless marriages which aren\t. or "She tries to hide it from me! I have bagged, pleated, and cried the same to him nothing has worked. Hypocrite It is natural to want to have some space from your partner after a conflict to cool your mind and avoid aggravating the situation. For the gift of giving should not expect return. Should I just let go of the rules and agreements we made as to how he would be when he worked away, and just say, "Go for it, honey, have a few drinks relax and unwind"? He also constantly interrupts me when I speak constantly seeking porn and sex chats stares at other women all the time but it is okay with me because he is uglyinside and outside. FYI A nice sweet hug without man-handling her is romantic! Everyone gets porridge in the morning etc. I do everything for him. New Season Prophetic Prayers and Declarations [NSPPD] || 6th At night he comes to bed when im asleep or visa versa we hardly touch he is afraid to even touch me. He really just thinks he is the best man in the world and I must just be the luckiest woman in the world and that I should feel even more lucky that he hasnt gotten rid of me because Im not that pretty and he feels ashamed of me because I dont wear enough makeup or nice enough clothes and I look so fat to him even though I am thinner now than when we married (I was about 15 lbs heavier than I am now but my body has changed due to children and he just thinks its ugly and thinks if I loose more weight it will look better but skinny cant erase stretch marks and aging) I will be ok I am trying my best but if I told him how I really felt or tried to get help from counseling e would think there was something wrong with me and he would kick me out without the kids because he cant have an unhappy woman around when hes such a great catch. Now I wonder if he is really gay and in denial. Also jokes saying I talk to much so not wanting to but have stopped talking as much to him. I'm kind of in the same boat myself, but you should NEVER think that things would be better if YOU were to die. Thankfully, he is going into counseling in a few days. (Ouch!). Dont have any expectations! The list went on and on I simply left it he got a hit from a woman who was shamming him for lying. I barely even ask. We act like were strong but in reality so vulnerable, when it comes to outbid husbands. Intimacy would be difficult to say the least. He says I deserve to be shouted at..etc. I'm not just a housewife to him, but his best friend and I am madly in love with him . He explained that at one point in this marriage, that he had lost sight of what a good marriage was and that his wife was working as hard as he was and that she didn't expect praises and compliments like men do, but she kept doing so much for him and his children and even for his mother popped in unexpectedly for visits ans still expected a lot from the wife. We moved 15 hours from my family and friends so he could work at a better site. He never held me and I cry and cry why me. He started to drink at night and not tell me about it. Ironically, friends I do have since I met him. 5 Relationship Issues No Couple Should Ignore | Psychology Today I think I can stick it out until they are at least older. Funny too. E mail me any time if u want to talk!! etcand still in love with the same fabulous lady! He gives same expression when at me, when his wife starts the conversation and I defend the conversation. I know we need counseling but he will absolutely NOT even consider it and if I went and he found out (which is likely because he controls the money) he would think I just had a mental problem and hate me even more. Do I also have a dad in Florida who suffers from Dementia. Yes, a fight is bound to ensue, but what do I care? Record him when he swears and play it during the time he is in good mood. I feel like I married the wrong woman. You didn't do anything wrong. He put us all in a financial hurt-lock and even didnt listen to me when he decided we should move in with my parents after quitting a good full-time job and moving in with them. He has a hearing problem and doesn't want to deal with it. Hes not a good communicator and turned quiet, but then it suddenly hit me am I too controlling? When I tell him to stop he gets this high pitch whin. From one wife to another! First of all I love Myself yes Me and No I am not conceded, If you dont love yourself how can you expect anyone else to? Both men and women have needs and they both should be respected equally. i just ask my husband do you want to go swimming , I am 52 mother of four grown children a size 8 he said arent you embarrassed the way you look . Your article is quite frankly demeaning towards men and assuming in general that women are always right to feel the way they do and men should be chastised for their wife's somehow justified "feelings" in any situation. I always like to use this thought as a reminder: Would I ever allow another man to speak to or treat my wife like I am doing? and my husband is to proud to see the hurt hes cousin me, for that reason im at my breaking point and accually living on hopesits enoff i just want him to tell me the thruth or leave me alone because hes not the man i loved and still love and that hurts me alooooooootttttt Your post has helped me realize that I need and want a divorce. It seemed that once i stopped doing the first thing that he didnt like I was doing something else he didnt care for. You deserve to be happy with another adult. My husband is very familiar with this story, as I tell it every time he hangs up on me which, conveniently, is always due to a technical issue with the phone. You should be proud of yourself; not every woman has such endurance. Begging is not the way. Bills, tools, papers. Im wondering if he has ADHD, BECAUSE OUR SON DOES, and he doesnt seem to be able to discuss things in an adult rationale way. WebThank you Father for everything, especially for ur love nd grace upon me ND my family . When I do something that offends him (which isnt hard to do) he sweats the small stuff and chooses to make everything a big deal, and he lets me know! Now I don't mean things all the time, just every once in a while. I swear feminism has destroyed american women. I agree with the others also we are all human and make mistakes. In the movie, husband is a firefighter.. Can't understand why he can save lives and fight fires everyday and she wants more like help around the house and to be more important to him than the boat he desires and the porn he watches. I dont think he even likes himself right now and on Monday night, he has his first appointment with a Christian counselor. If I try and say anything, he gets upset. Your not alone sweetheart! Seems to me the biggest issues seem to be with communication. It tears me up. This one hurts me the most. So , I guess what I'm saying is, most men might do some of these things by accident, but there are those who do them because they really do think their wife is not good enough. Not ONE day!!! Thats just my experience for what its worth. Im sorry to tell you, but he will never change. On our way back to our home, I brought this up to my husbands attention and my husband realized the mistake and apologies to me. They share the responsibility for retirement planning and investment decisions. . I only want a listening ear sometimes and all he wants to do is suggest solutions, which I need absolutely no help in, as I know my job much better than he does. How do we keep from hurting one another, if we keep thinking we are mind readers. He says just ignore her. I always will until they are all grown. I am the problem in his eye and he just does his own thing. You not going to a counselor is a win on his part because the counselor's info can be used in court to help you win. Good luck. But not from him. Thanks for putting in the effort! so im surprised I didnt relate to this one as well. I think i see this happening a lot for most of the women I know. if you have no communication this must be your imagination. N How will I know if he doesnt want to communcate, he say he loves me n thats enough for him, but that doesnt fix the issues in our marriage,ive read men never change yes they can thats b..l c..p! What do it do!! Or secure as is wife i need to check up on everything. We dont have family near by, and I dont like to make a big deal out of my birthday, but within our nuclear family we have always made birthdays special. I kept trying and trying. My husband and I were friends for years before we started a relationship together. Yes, they fight for our freedom, but some of them are crooked and live double lives, and there are women who live on or near the base just to trap military men just for the money, Kate- Do not receive the negativity on here. These women are doing the maximum. He keeps his phone on silent for when people call him I cant hear it go off. Praying for you. The truth is neither of these lists are exhaustive and are both simply a view if one(two) persons top 7. Its a little irritating to read some of the comments that read more into the text than is written.. And we are both guilty of every one of the 7 . It didnt just happen and the reasons why are many, but some of them are the problems I have to deal with from my spouse that are completely unnecessary. My husband video-called me to share his happiness with me and connected me in 3-way video calling. And saying weird-ass shit like I want to slap your ass, put butter your butt, poke you in the ear or even weirder sayings. I know the stress and depression is not good for my growing baby, but I just cannot hold myself together with my world falling to pieces. I love and respect my husband. The man I am currently talking about is number 3 and the last. No this I not a excuses but men like to hear how well they are working makes them feel as we men would say, THE MAN so after a while when the wife say hey you need to do this or do that more times than saying to the Husband I know you worked hard this week or today your such a hard worker you see what Im doing women leading my way into asking not just coming out to ask and yes that can work both ways also women take in consideration that some times men hear this more from freinds and others, than there wife or kids so thats why sometimes so fast to help others than to help you. You made a snarky comment about a man likes only a few things and that you want women to find out what men want. Cuts her out of the discussion When you act as if she isnt even there or wouldnt understand what youre talking about, she feels a part of her is detached. Your post hit everything I have been doing wrong thank u but I still help some help I really dont want to lose her at all .. again we both need help thank for, I need help i been with my wife for 19 years and i keep lying to her i need to stop or she will divorce me, Through I agree with these, it also misses some big hurts. My husband and I have been married for almost 3 years, together for 4. . The ABC News/Hulu documentary The Ashley Madison Affair tells the tale of the now famous website used by those seeking to have extramarital affairsLets just say if you He force me to get my licence so he don't have to drive me around and my children for my appointment. I feel bruised and broken. Dont expect him to understand. But he hardly pays attention to them then.He Acts like he love me at certain points and then the rest of the days Im no one.